Author Topic: The Nun in the Airport!  (Read 1055 times)

Offline GrayBeard

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The Nun in the Airport!
« on: October 03, 2010, 11:53:51 pm »

A NUN WAS SITTING AT THE VICTORIA AIRPORT, WAITING FOR HER FLIGHT TO  CALGARY.
SHE  LOOKED OVER IN THE CORNER AND SAW ONE OF THOSE WEIGHT MACHINES THAT TELLS YOUR  FORTUNE, AND THOUGHT TO HERSELF, 'I'LL GIVE IT A TRY AND SEE WHAT IT TELLS ME.'
SHE  WENT OVER TO THE MACHINE, STEPPED UP ON THE SCALE AND PUT HER NICKEL IN. OUT CAME A CARD THAT READ:  'YOU ARE A NUN, YOU WEIGH 128 LBS,AND YOU ARE GOING TO CALGARY.'
 
           
THE  NUN SAT BACK DOWN. SHE TOLD HERSELF THAT THE MACHINE PROBABLY GIVES THE SAME CARD TO EVERYONE.  THE  MORE SHE THOUGHT ABOUT IT THE MORE CURIOUS SHE GOT SO SHE DECIDED TO TRY IT AGAIN.   SHE  WENT BACK TO THE MACHINE AND AGAIN PUT A NICKEL IN, AND OUT CAME  A CARD THAT READ: 'YOU  ARE A NUN, YOU WEIGH 128 LBS, YOU ARE GOING TO CALGARY  AND YOU ARE  GOING TO PLAY A FIDDLE.'
   

THE  NUN SAYS TO HERSELF, 'I KNOW THAT IS WRONG, I HAVE  NEVER PLAYED A MUSICAL  INSTRUMENT EVEN ONCE IN MY LIFE.'  SHE SAT BACK DOWN.

   
FROM  OUT OF NOWHERE A COWBOY CAME OVER AND SAT DOWN, PUTTING HIS FIDDLE CASE ON THE SEAT BETWEEN THEM.

WITHOUT THINKING, SHE OPENED THE COWBOY'S CASE, TOOK OUT THE FIDDLE, AND STARTED PLAYING BEAUTIFUL MUSIC.

 
SURPRISED  AT WHAT SHE HAD DONE, SHE LOOKED OVER AT THE  MACHINE, THINKING, 'THIS  IS INCREDIBLE, I'VE GOT TO TRY THIS  AGAIN.' BACK TO THE MACHINE SHE WENT, PUT IN ANOTHER NICKEL, AND ANOTHER CARD CAME OUT. IT READ: 'YOU ARE A NUN, YOU WEIGH 128 LBS, YOU  ARE GOING TO  CALGARY AND YOU ARE GOING TO BREAK  WIND.' NOW  SHE KNOWS THE MACHINE IS WRONG,AS SHE THOUGHT TO HERSELF,  'I'VE NEVER BROKEN WIND IN PUBLIC A SINGLE TIME IN MY LIFE.'  BUT GETTING DOWN OFF THE MACHINE SHE SLIPPED,AND AS SHE WAS  STRAINING TO KEEP HERSELF FROM FALLING TO THE FLOOR, SHE BROKE  WIND.
 
ABSOLUTELY  STUNNED, SHE SAT BACK DOWN AND LOOKED AT THE MACHINE. SHE SAID  TO HERSELF, 'THIS IS TRULY REMARKABLE. I'VE GOT TO TRY THIS AGAIN.' SHE WENT BACK TO THE MACHINE, PUT IN ANOTHER NICKEL AND ANOTHER CARD CAME OUT.

  IT  READ: 'YOU  ARE A NUN, YOU WEIGH 128 LBS, YOU HAVE FIDDLED AND FARTED AROUND AND MISSED YOUR FLIGHT TO CALGARY.
I never really wanted to grow up....All I wanted was to be able to reach the cookie jar...and play with my DW 788

Offline jimbo

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Re: The Nun in the Airport!
« Reply #1 on: October 04, 2010, 01:32:00 am »
Serves her rite she should not have been so nosy
Jimbo

Offline julief

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Re: The Nun in the Airport!
« Reply #2 on: October 04, 2010, 07:25:32 am »
Very funny.

Offline Russ C

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Re: The Nun in the Airport!
« Reply #3 on: October 04, 2010, 09:08:35 am »
LOL. Good one. I haven't heard that term (fiddle farting around) since I was a kid.  :D
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Offline GrayBeard

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Re: The Nun in the Airport!
« Reply #4 on: October 04, 2010, 11:08:03 am »
Russ it must be a 'regional' thing. I hear it and use it all the time!
Of course this close to the Ozarks we have more 'fiddles', but I can't say anything about having more farts!

~~~GB~~~
I never really wanted to grow up....All I wanted was to be able to reach the cookie jar...and play with my DW 788

Dawie

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Re: The Nun in the Airport!
« Reply #5 on: October 04, 2010, 02:04:38 pm »
 ;D Great one GB.
David

Offline termite

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Re: The Nun in the Airport!
« Reply #6 on: October 04, 2010, 08:26:26 pm »
if thats not a winner, i dont know what is

northie66

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Re: The Nun in the Airport!
« Reply #7 on: October 05, 2010, 06:02:09 am »
HAHAHA!   ;D

Offline Marcellarius

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Re: The Nun in the Airport!
« Reply #8 on: October 05, 2010, 11:28:02 am »
Thats funny  ;D :D
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