Author Topic: Tom's Accident  (Read 1694 times)

Offline Billy in Va

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 1002
  • DONT GROW UP ITS A TRAP!!!
    • View Profile
Tom's Accident
« on: January 21, 2013, 10:33:48 pm »
The best story of the year doesn't give the proper praise and credit for this painful but understandable story as told by a loving wife.......

The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise. Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible motorcycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him." You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagine the pain that poor Tom must have experienced. "Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain." We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place."

Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom.

"Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely." All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.

A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, "I'm Tom Smith." The entire congregation held its breath.

"I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."
Common Sense is a flower that does not grow in everyone's garden
Scrollin' - Scrollin' Scrollin' on the River

Offline mickey357

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 692
    • View Profile
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #1 on: January 21, 2013, 11:16:39 pm »
 :D :D :D :D :D :D I have to pass this one on in e-mail.Thanks !!!

rob roy

  • Guest
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #2 on: January 22, 2013, 04:55:05 am »
That one is getting passed on Billy ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Rob Roy.

Offline wombatie

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 5557
  • Victoria Australia
    • View Profile
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #3 on: January 22, 2013, 05:42:15 am »
 :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D  Loved it.

Marg
MARG

No one notices what I do until I'm not here to do it............

Offline Keefie

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 4550
    • View Profile
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #4 on: January 22, 2013, 10:05:28 am »
 :D :D :D :D :D love it, it's going to go on my email list lol.
It's all a case of "Mind over Matter",  The Government don't Mind, and I don't Matter.

Offline newfie

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 5037
  • The Way I Scroll
    • View Profile
    • some of my woodworking
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #5 on: January 22, 2013, 10:18:51 am »
 ;D ;D ;D LOL


excalibur 21
Every woodworker needs a fireplace

Offline Russ C

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Global Moderator
  • Posts: 8458
  • Central Florida - USA
    • View Profile
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #6 on: January 22, 2013, 05:19:25 pm »
ROFLMBO  ::)  ::)  ::)  :D  :D  :D  :D  :D  :D
russ@simplywoodencreations.com

Keep The Blade On The Line.

king310

  • Guest
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #7 on: January 22, 2013, 09:16:53 pm »
Good thing it was not his tail bone. ;D

Offline troy_curtis

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 1104
  • No matter where you go...there you are.
    • View Profile
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #8 on: January 24, 2013, 11:59:09 pm »
As a minister of the word I have heard some pretty funny things from the church members. This one would be in the top ten. Thanks for sharing. Sad thing is this reminded me of a boy I knew in high school. He had a skiing accident and went off a jump to land on a barb wire fence...straddled. He had a torn scrotum... not sternum. He walked funny for quite some time. The worst part of it is, he didnt stop skiing until he hit a post at the end of the fence.  :o :'(

Offline Billy in Va

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 1002
  • DONT GROW UP ITS A TRAP!!!
    • View Profile
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #9 on: January 25, 2013, 08:58:59 am »
Yeowwwwwww     Troy  Just reading that is going to make me walk funny for at least half a day  (shuddddddering)
Common Sense is a flower that does not grow in everyone's garden
Scrollin' - Scrollin' Scrollin' on the River

rob roy

  • Guest
Re: Tom's Accident
« Reply #10 on: January 25, 2013, 09:13:27 am »
My eyes are watering at the thought Troy. :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
Rob Roy.

 

SMF

Teknoromi