That's good Richard, you faced the beast. When I cut my fingers off, the Dr. said, "now you goning to go home and throw that saw away?" I told him, "if I fell off a horse and broke my arm should I kill the horse? Don't think so!" I must admit it took me a while before I faced the saw, but when I did we had a good talk.. That was about eight or nine years ago. I still get up tight when I use the table saw, but I do it anyway. That saw died this year and I miss her. I had her for at least 15 years. Not bad for a $100.00 saw.
Hang in there Richard. You will come back strong. We are praying for you.