A humorous email is doing the rounds purporting to contain extracts from church newsletters. Her are a few examples:
Don't let worry kill you off - let the church help.
Miss Charlene Mason sang I Will Not Pass This Way Again giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.
For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on Oct. 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What the Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice.
Eight new choir robes are needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some of the old ones.
Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.
Potluck supper Sunday at 5pm - prayer and medication to follow.
The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.
Low Self-Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7pm. Please use back door.
The eighth graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement Friday at 7pm. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday, " I upped My Pledge - Up Yours.
Marg