A drunk sat down on the subway next to a priest. The drunks tie was stained, his face was plastered with lipstick and a half empty bottle of gin stuck out of his torn coat pocket. The drunk opened a newspaper and started reading.
After a few minutes the drunk turned to the priest and asked, "Father, what caused arthritis?" The priest replied, "Son, it is caused by loose living, being with cheap women, too much alcohol, contempt for your fellow man, sleeping with prostitutes and lack of bathing."
The drunk muttered, "Well, I'll be!" and returned to reading the paper.
The priest thought a minute about what he said, apologized saying, "I'm sorry, I did not meant to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?"
The drunk replied, " I don't have it Father; I was just reading in the paper that the Pope does."