This is the story of a couple who have been happily married for 40 years. The only friction in their marriage was the husbands habit of farting loudly every morning when he woke. The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn?t stop it and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor; she was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out. Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs fast asleep, she looks at the bowl where she had put the turkey?s innards, neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband wake with his usual trumpeting and a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom. The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing; tears in her eyes. After years of torture she reckoned she had got her own back.
About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face. She bit the inside of her lip and asked him what was the matter. He Said ?Honey, you were right. All those years you warned me and I didn?t listen to you?
?What do you mean?? asked the wife. ?Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out and today it finally happened. But??.by the grace of God, some Vaseline and these two fingers, I think I got most of them back in.?
