Author Topic: Oxymorons....  (Read 996 times)

Offline GrayBeard

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Oxymorons....
« on: August 31, 2011, 11:47:42 am »

0  x  y  m  o  r   o  n s
 
1.   Is it good if a vacuum really sucks? 

2.     Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

3.   If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

4.   If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words? 

5.   Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack? 

6.   Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing? 

7.   Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing? 

8 .   Why do "tug" boats push their barges? 

9.   Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game"
when we are already there?

10.   Why are they called " stands" when they are made for sitting? 

11.   Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"? 

12..   Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected? 

13..   Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites? 

14.   Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things? 

15.   Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds? 

16.   If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it? 

17..   If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? 

18.   If   love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? 

19.   If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right? 

20.   Why is bra singular and panties plural?

21..   Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control
when you know the batteries are dead? 

22.   Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase? 

23.   How come abbreviated is such a long word? 

24.  Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? 

25..   Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? 

26.   Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one? 

27. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?
 
28.  Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway ?
I dunno , why do we?

~~~GB~~~
I never really wanted to grow up....All I wanted was to be able to reach the cookie jar...and play with my DW 788

Offline dgman

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Re: Oxymorons....
« Reply #1 on: August 31, 2011, 01:18:50 pm »
So...Where are the answers? ::)
Dan In Southern California

Chachi

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Re: Oxymorons....
« Reply #2 on: August 31, 2011, 02:21:07 pm »
I would like to know that myself Dan
LOL so true GB

stephenD

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Re: Oxymorons....
« Reply #3 on: September 05, 2011, 10:09:56 pm »
Is an oxymoron a really stupid bovine?

Offline Gabby

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Re: Oxymorons....
« Reply #4 on: September 06, 2011, 01:53:47 am »
It's a Moron dragging one of those green tanks around.
Oxygen + Moron =Oxymoron.
ROFLMBO
Gabby
MOLON LABE.
TRUST IN GOD!
 DON'T BELIEVE ALL YOU HEAR & DON'T SAY ALL THAT YOU THINK !

Dawie

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Re: Oxymorons....
« Reply #5 on: September 07, 2011, 08:01:10 am »
 :D Nice GB ;D
David

Offline Marcellarius

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Re: Oxymorons....
« Reply #6 on: September 07, 2011, 09:41:38 am »
So...Where are the answers? ::)

for you Dan her are the answers:

a) because I want to!  ;D
b) do you have a better idea?  ???
c) you sound like my wife now :o
d) do we??  ::)
e) we don't know better   ;)
f) all of the above

use them freely  ;D :D ;D
Marcel

sometimes I make designer firewood....

 

SMF

Teknoromi