What's wrong with the shoes is that there is no room for toes. The way they're drawn (second pattern), shows a uniforn width all the way down to the toes. Shoes don't do that. They need to hold your toes in! Make the toe end a larger cut out and I think you will be happier.
As to the mouth, widen it a bit. The "butterfly" look is better than the second pattern IMO but it is too vertical. Mouths are horizontal. In the second pattern, her mouth looks like it is hanging open which doesn't seem to fit the overall look. Also include the corners of the mouth or at least a suggestion of them.
I couldn't design a pattern to save my life so please don't take the critiques badly. I have the utmost respect for those that can do it. Give me a blank piece of paper and that's what you would still have when I got done. I'm just trying to explain why I think it looks a little off.
I absolutely agree with everything you said. My problems is the more I look at it the more frustrated I get and of course once that happens, anything I try to do to the pattern comes out worse then when I started.
The shoes....that frontal view...she is wearing heels so the feet are in the right position, but to get the look that you describe...I get it, but I can't seem to draw it. As for the mouth, I wanted the woman to show a complete lack of interest, boredom with the gentleman. Also, maybe a bit of snobbery (is that a word?). Again, I agree with your suggestions.
Right now, I've already attempted to cut this piece three times and all have ended up in the scrap pile. Once my level of frustration comes down, I will attempt to make the proper adjustments and I think I will again ask the forum for input before actually cutting the piece.
And ALL criticism is most welcome. Can't learn without it.
