Author Topic: The Divorce  (Read 1063 times)

Offline Keefie

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The Divorce
« on: September 25, 2012, 01:41:54 pm »
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a
pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells, dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods.
She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning
and mopping and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit...   Repairmen refused to work in the house...The maid quit...   Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and
decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually, even the local Estate Agents refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back...

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was he agreed on price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth...  But only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home...


....including the curtain rods


I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON'T YOU????
It's all a case of "Mind over Matter",  The Government don't Mind, and I don't Matter.

rob roy

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Re: The Divorce
« Reply #1 on: September 25, 2012, 04:25:07 pm »
Hi Keefie, I hope this isn't YOUR story. LOL.
Rob Roy.

Offline Rapid Roger

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Re: The Divorce
« Reply #2 on: September 26, 2012, 09:53:01 am »
Pay-backs can be heck!
I once saw a personalized licence tag on a new Corvette that said "WAS HIS".  :o ::) ;D 8)

Rog
An ounce of responsablity is worth 10 pounds of state and fedral laws.

Offline wombatie

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Re: The Divorce
« Reply #3 on: September 27, 2012, 02:22:11 am »
My daughter should read this.   :) :) :) :) ;)

Marg
MARG

No one notices what I do until I'm not here to do it............

Offline Crabbyboater

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Re: The Divorce
« Reply #4 on: October 02, 2012, 05:26:30 pm »
I saw one on a new 'vette in San Diego that said "EX-WIFE".  I could read several things into that!
Your web footed friend in Seattle, WA.

 

SMF

Teknoromi