Topics

856

The Coffee Shop / At the Pearly Gates!

« on: July 27, 2011, 12:00:48 am »

MEN IN HEAVEN
 
When everyone on earth was dead and waiting to enter Paradise, God appeared and said, "I want the men to make two lines. One line is for the men who were true heads of their household, and the other line for the men who were dominated by their women. I want all the women to report to St. Peter."
Soon, the women were gone, and there were two lines of men. The line of the men who were dominated by their wives was 100 miles long, and in the line of men who truly were heads of their household, there was only one man. God said, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves! I created you to be the head of your household! You have been disobedient and have not fulfilled your purpose! Of all of you, only one obeyed. Learn from him."
 
God turned to the one man, "How did you manage to be the only one in this line?"
 
The man replied, "My wife told me to stand here".

857

General Scroll Saw Talk / Scrollers Beware!

« on: July 26, 2011, 06:21:36 pm »

It is HOT in many areas and I am in one of them. As I was working in the shop today, drinking Gatorade constantly and taking frequent inside 'cooling' breaks I was doing fine.

However, about 3:45 I realized that I had stopped sweating and was getting a slight headache!

I immediately shut things down and came inside and got in the shower! Drank cool, not cold, Gatorade and lots of water.

Feeling fine but very tired now.

The symptoms I was experiencing were the first stages of Heat Stroke. I have dealt with it in the past with others and never really experienced it myself.

Please, guys and gals, Be Careful out in this prolonged heat.

From past First Aid experience I estimate I was about 30 minutes from passing out. AND I didn't really feel that bad. It will sneak up on you!!!

~~~GrayBeard~~~

858

The Coffee Shop / New sign in Atlanta, GA Wal~Mart!

« on: July 25, 2011, 05:18:43 pm »

Kinda says it all!

859

The Coffee Shop / Rascals!

« on: July 25, 2011, 03:56:16 pm »

I have been pretty quiet about 'my' ballclub but I am going to give an update.

The Rascals are now firmly in first place after winning 12 of their last 13 games and two of those were 'come from behind' wins against the league's second place team.

The closest opponent in our division is now 7 1/2 games out and our 'magic number' is down to 20!

It is looking like we are pretty much a shoo-in for winning our division and very likely we will repeat as league champions.

Go RASCALS!!!

~~~GB~~~

860

Pattern Requests. / Logo pattern request...

« on: July 25, 2011, 03:52:08 pm »

I did it!

I have been commissioned to make a number of different 'baseball' related plaques for the gift shop at the Rascals ballpark!

Now I need a good clean pattern of this logo that I can do in various sizes from about 3" high to up to 10" high.

Any of my 'designing friends' care to give me a hand.

861

General Scroll Saw Talk / Spiral Blades....

« on: July 22, 2011, 03:45:31 pm »

Just a 'tip' for those who have not tried Spiral blades or are considering trying them...

I just put together a stack of FIVE pieces of 1/8" BB plywood for a production order. This is the 'thickest' bundle I have ever cut using the FD New Spiral 2/0.
IF you decide to go this route EVER...make darn sure you keep a close feel on your blade and the way it cuts!

Normally I will cut stacks of two or three at a time. With the 5/8" stack I am going through blades much more quickly. (duh!) I couldn't hardly believe how fast they dull down cutting that thickness.

~~~GrayBeard~~~

862

The Coffee Shop / Man's lifespan explained!

« on: July 21, 2011, 05:06:38 pm »

On the first day, God created the dog and said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years."




The dog said, "That's a long time to be barking.. How about only ten years and I'll give you back the other ten?"




So God agreed......






On the second day, God created the monkey and said, "Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I'll give you a twenty-year life span."




The monkey said, "Monkey tricks for twenty years? That's a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like the dog did?"




And God agreed......









On the third day, God created the cow and said, "You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer's family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years."




The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. How about twenty and I'll give back the other forty?"




And God agreed again......






On the fourth day, God created humans and said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I'll give you twenty years."




But the human said, "Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my twenty, the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?"




"Okay," said God. "You asked for it."




So that is why for our first twenty years, we eat, sleep, play and enjoy ourselves. For the next forty years, we slave in the sun to support our family.. For the next ten years, we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren. And for the last ten years, we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.




Life has now been explained to you.




There is no need to thank me for this valuable information.
I'm doing it as a public service.
If you are looking for me I will be on the front porch.

863

The Coffee Shop / Christmas in July ....

« on: July 21, 2011, 10:21:26 am »

I just got an advertisement for a Christmas in July sale!

That reminded me that Monday is exactly 6 months from the Big Day!

Are we all interested in an ORNAMENT Exchange this year?
It's not too early to start thinking about what you will make for the exchange IF we have one...

~~~GrayBeard~~~

864

The Coffee Shop / How HOT has it been in St. Louis?

« on: July 20, 2011, 11:32:45 pm »

Now this is HOT!!!

865

The Coffee Shop / Would you get married again?

« on: July 20, 2011, 01:43:03 pm »

A husband and wife are sitting quietly in bed reading when the Wife looks over
at him and asks the question....

WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married
Again?"

HUSBAND:
"Definitely not!"

WIFE: "Why not?
Don't you like being married?"

HUSBAND: "Of
course I do.."

WIFE: "Then why
wouldn't you remarry? "

HUSBAND: "Okay,
okay, I'd get married again."

WIFE: "You
would?" (with a hurt look)

HUSBAND: (makes
audible groan)

WIFE: "Would
you live in our house?"

HUSBAND: "Sure,
it's a great house."

WIFE: "Would
you sleep with her in our bed?"

HUSBAND: "Where
else would we sleep?"

WIFE: "Would
you let her drive my car?"

HUSBAND:
"Probably, it is almost new."

WIFE: "Would
you replace my pictures with hers?"

HUSBAND: "That
would seem like the proper thing to do."

WIFE: "Would
you give her my jewelry?"

HUSBAND: "No, I'm
sure she'd want her own."

WIFE: "Would
you take her golfing with you?

HUSBAND: "Yes,  those are always good times."

WIFE: "Would she use my clubs?

HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."                                                         
                             
WIFE: -- silence --

HUSBAND:   "Oh CRAP!"
 

866

The Coffee Shop / Growing Old together...and one got smarter!

« on: July 20, 2011, 01:25:26 pm »

After being married for 40 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said .... "Forty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old girl.

Now ... I have a $500,000.00 home, a $35,000.00 car, a nice big bed and a large screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 63-year-old woman. It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV.

Aren't older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy's problems, eh!

867

The Coffee Shop / Judy H. is feeling a little better!

« on: July 19, 2011, 12:05:42 pm »

Great to see your picture in the sidebar girl!

Keep up the rest and jump in when you feel up to it.........

~~~GB~~~

868

The Coffee Shop / Would YOU go to jail for growing 'veggies'???

« on: July 14, 2011, 01:22:32 pm »

Watch THIS!

http://www.newsy.com/videos/jail-time-for-growing-veggies/

~~~GB~~~

869

Swap Shop / 788 metal stand....

« on: July 14, 2011, 11:09:08 am »

Anyone interested in my DeWalt 788 stand...since I built one for cutting while sitting I no longer need the big metal one.
I will work with anyone who wants to have this stand as far as packing and shipping.

~~~GB~~~

870

General Scroll Saw Talk / 788 stand..reworked!

« on: July 13, 2011, 03:06:18 pm »

Took a stand I had and did major surgery and made a stand so I can SIT 'n' Saw!

The top is a piece of 3/4" ply from 1954!
Part of a chest my dad made for storage and finally doing more good in many other projects!
True 3/4" and hard as a rock-only 3 plies!