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Topics - GrayBeard

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1366
The Coffee Shop / Universal LAWS...No. 6 thru 10
« on: October 14, 2010, 10:52:10 am »

6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

7. Law of the Bath - Whenever the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

8. Law of Close Encounters -The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you shouldn't be seen with.

9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

10. Law of bio mechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the location on the body.

1367
General Scroll Saw Talk / DeWalt 788 in Tampa....
« on: October 14, 2010, 10:43:05 am »
I was just wandering around eBay and saw a 788 listed in the Tampa area.
Has one day left and only bid up to about $125 so far.

Looks like a good saw...
just do a search for 'scroll saw'

~~~GB~~~

1369
The Coffee Shop / Can you identify this?
« on: October 13, 2010, 04:23:34 pm »
Interesting concept!

1370
The Coffee Shop / WOOT is at it again...
« on: October 13, 2010, 01:23:48 am »
If you are in the market for a computer there is a fine machine on the WOOT for Wednesday! Offer good until midnight Wed. or it sells out which it likely will!
Check it out!

$419 with $5 shipping...

www.woot.com

~~~GB~~~

1371
General Scroll Saw Talk / Update: Old Oak Table .....
« on: October 12, 2010, 04:50:06 pm »
Legs just received the 2nd coat of PolyU...

Base (I call it the Barrel) got first coat of PolyU.

Top...Top side is sanded to 400 grit, stained "MinWax Golden Oak" and ready for the poly. Underside has been almost totally stripped of all the Dr. Pepper that had run over the edges and dried on the under side! Had to take a break and get some air! Scrubbed with Mineral Spirits then Denatured Alcohol and was doing the final wipe with Lacquer Thinner when the fumes finally got me! So the window is open, fans running and I am sitting next to the open patio door! Been a loong time since I did that number!
Will Poly the underside later today and start the top side in the morning when the legs and 'barrel' move out of the way!

ADDENDUM...wandered through an Antique Mall Saturday and found FOUR chairs that are perfect to replace our older ones! Solid oak with the fibreboard seats (need replacements) and in good condition. Will only require using a finish restorer and not sanding down to bare wood! Furniture Restoring place said the best thing to cut the new chair inserts to shape is a SCROLLSAW! (Imagine That)

Table: Free
Chairs and parts: $145
Restoring Labor: My Own!

New "Antique Table and Chairs": PRICELESS

~~~GrayBeard~~~

1372
The Coffee Shop / HOW OLD is Grand Ma?
« on: October 12, 2010, 04:10:56 pm »

One evening a grandson was talking to his grandmother about current events.
The grandson asked his grandmother what she thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general..

The Grandmother replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born before:

'       television

'       penicillin

'       polio shots

'       frozen foods

'       Xerox

'       contact lenses

'       Frisbees and

'       the pill

There were no:

'       credit cards

'       laser beams or

'       ball-point pens

Man had not invented:

'       pantyhose

'       air conditioners

'       dishwashers

'       clothes dryers

'       and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and

'      man hadn't yet walked on the moon


Your Grandfather and I got married first, .. ... ... and then lived together..   

Every family had a father and a mother.

Until I was 25, I called every man older than me, "Sir".
And after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir."

We were before gay-rights, computer- dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy.

Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense.   

We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions.

Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege...

We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.   

Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.   

Draft dodgers were those who closed front doors as the evening breeze started.   

Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends-not purchasing condominiums.



We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings.   

We listened to Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios.   

And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.   

If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan ' on it, it was junk   

The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam....   

Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of.

We had 5 &10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents.

Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel.

And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.

You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, . .. . but who could afford one?
Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.   

In my day:

'       "grass" was mowed,

'       "coke" was a cold drink,

'      "pot" was something your mother cooked in and

'       "rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby.   

'       "Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office,   

'      " chip" meant a piece of wood,

'       "hardware" was found in a hardware store and

'     "software" wasn't even a word.


And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby.

No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap. and how old do you think I am?

I bet you have this old lady in mind....you are in for a shock!

Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time.   

Are you ready ?????


This woman would be only 59 years old.

GIVES YOU SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT...

1373
The Coffee Shop / "True American" humor!
« on: October 12, 2010, 12:58:36 pm »
It is time to change from REDNECK humor to TRUE AMERICAN Humor!

Only it isn't seen as HUMOR, but the correct way to LIVE YOUR LIFE!
If you feel the same, pass this on to your True Americanfriends.
Y'all know who they are...


You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
It never occurred to you to be offended by the phrase, 'One nation, under God.'

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
You've never protested about seeing the 10 Commandments posted in public places.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
You still say 'Christmas' instead of 'Winter Festival.'

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
You bow your head when someone prays.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
You stand and place your hand over your heart when they play the National Anthem.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
You treat Viet Nam vets with great respect, and always have.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
You've never burned an American flag.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
You know what you believe and you aren't afraid to say so, no matter who is listening.

You might be a TRUE AMERICAN if:
You respect your elders and expect your kids to do the same.

~~~GrayBeard~~~

1374
The Coffee Shop / Hey there WI railfan.....
« on: October 11, 2010, 05:27:47 pm »
How come all your railroad cars are so clean?

There is not a bit of "Hobo Art" on any of them!!!

Aren't you guys supposed to be going for "authenticity"???

Inquiring minds.....

~~~GrayBeard~~~

1375
The Coffee Shop / Universal Laws...#1 thru #5
« on: October 11, 2010, 03:30:47 pm »
 UNIVERSAL LAWS

 

1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

3. Law of Probability -The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act

4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal and someone always answers.

5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

~~~GB~~~

1376
The Coffee Shop / The E. R. .......
« on: October 11, 2010, 03:28:30 pm »
A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to the Emergency Room, took the husband aside, and said,

'I don't like the looks of your wife at all.'


'Me neither doc,'
said the husband.

'But she's a great cook, great in bed and really good with the kids.'

~~~GB~~~

1377
The Coffee Shop / Vacation Clothes Shopping...
« on: October 11, 2010, 03:26:40 pm »
While shopping for vacation clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice.

'What do you think?' I asked.. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?'

'Better get a bikini,' he replied 'You'd never get it all in one.'

He's still in intensive care. Send Cards!

~~~GB~~~

1378
The Coffee Shop / Teh Graveside Service....
« on: October 11, 2010, 03:24:44 pm »
The graveside service just barely finished, when there was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the distance.

The little old man looked at the preacher and calmly said,

'Well......she's there.'

~~~GB~~~

1379
The Coffee Shop / Stuff You Didn't Know You Didn't Know #5
« on: October 11, 2010, 01:10:06 pm »

The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work:

Alaska

1380
The Coffee Shop / Hey, yyyyyguy!!!!
« on: October 10, 2010, 08:44:28 pm »
Are you back home now?

Tell us all about your Adventure in Disney World!!!!

~~~GrayBeard~~~

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